Yes Means Yes!: Visions of Female Sexual Power and A World Without RapeThis groundbreaking look at rape, edited by writer and activist Jaclyn Freidman and Sex Object author Jessica Valenti, dismantles the way we view rape in our culture and replaces it with a genuine understanding and respect for female sexual pleasure. In the original edition, feminist, political, and activist writers alike presented their ideas for a paradigm shift from the "No Means No" model--and the results were the groundbreaking shift to affirmative consent ("Yes Means Yes," as coined by the book) that we know today. With a timely new introduction, refreshed cover, and the timeless contributions of authors from Kate Harding to Jill Filipovic, Yes Means Yes brings to the table a dazzling variety of perspectives and experiences focused on the theory that educating all people to value female sexuality and pleasure leads to viewing women differently, and ending rape. Yes Means Yes has radical and far-reaching effects: from teaching men to treat women as collaborators and not conquests, encouraging men and women that women can enjoy sex instead of being shamed for it, and ultimately, that our children can inherit a world where rape is rare and swiftly punished. |
Contents
| 1 | |
Introduction 5 | 5 |
The Conservative Gender Norms That Perpetuate Rape Culture and How Feminists Can Fight Back 13
| 13 |
2 Toward a Performance Model of Sex 29
| 29 |
Consent as Sexual Process 43 | 43 |
4 A Womans Worth 53 | 53 |
5 How Do You Fuck a Fat Woman? 67 | 67 |
6 Queering Black Female Heterosexuality 77
| 77 |
The Lessons Boys Learn and Dont Learn About Sexuality and Why a SexPositive Rape Prevention Paradigm Can Benefit Everyone Involved 193
| 193 |
17 The NotRape Epidemic 209 | 209 |
18 Shame Is the First Betrayer 221 | 221 |
19 Why Nice Guys Finish Last 227 | 227 |
20 Sex Worth Fighting For 241 | 241 |
A Personal Story of Love Violence and Strategies for Survival 251
| 251 |
22 When Pregnancy Is Outlawed Only Outlaws WillBe Pregnant 265 | 265 |
A Conversation with Three Sex Workers on Sexuality Empowerment and the Industry 273
| 273 |
Surviving Incestin Real Life 93 | 93 |
8 A Love Letter from an AntiRape Activist to Her Feminist SexToy Store 107
| 107 |
Why the Female Sexual Submissive Scares Us and Why She Shouldnt 117
| 117 |
10 Invasion of Space by a Female 127 | 127 |
Sexual Violence Against Immigrant Women in the United States 141 | 141 |
Black Female Lasciviousness and the Question of Consent 151
| 151 |
How Date Rape Became Gray Rape and Why It Matters 163
| 163 |
Rape Culture Explicit Verbal Consent and Body Sovereignty 171
| 171 |
15 An Immodest Proposal 179 | 179 |
24 The ProcessOriented Virgin 287 | 287 |
The Myth of Sexual Purity and How It Reinforces Rape Culture 299
| 299 |
26 Real Sex Education 305 | 305 |
How I Stopped Worrying and Learned to Love Pleasure and How You Can Too 313
| 313 |
notes 321 | 321 |
| 333 | |
about the contributors 341 | 341 |
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Common terms and phrases
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