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Abruzzi adop adopt across racial adopted child adopted children adopting a black adoption agencies adoptive couples adoptive families adoptive parenthood American Ann and Steve Ann says answer applicants arrival attitude awareness baby began biological mother biological parents black child black children caseworker chil Christine says Conrads couple's David Kirk develop Ellen experience explains fact Fanshel feeling felt foster home friends girl Goldens grow Hagen Holt idea of interracial identity important Indian infertility interview involved James Jim and Susan Johanna John Joshua Kirk Korean children Laura learned live Lucy MacLeans marriage married married couples Martha Milanos Miss Connors Miss Morris Miss Wise months neighborhood nonwhite children older Peace Corps placement Poussaint problems questions race racial difference racial lines racist recalls remembers Robin seemed social worker Steve says sure talk tend thing thought tion tive parents told understand white Americans white parents