I'm Not Mad, I Just Hate You!: A New Understanding of Mother-Daughter Conflict (Google eBook)

Front Cover
Penguin, Mar 1, 2000 - Family & Relationships - 288 pages
4 Reviews
For mothers who are reeling from the rockiness of an ever-changing adolescent, or struggling with a relationship that's deteriorating by the day, here is encouragement, reassurance, and great advice. "I'm Not Mad, I Just Hate You!" discusses the social, emotional, cultural, and psychological issues that can lead to mother-daughter conflicts. It offers illuminating and very recognizable case studies, and demonstrates how mother-daughter friction during adolescence can actually empower girls by teaching them invaluable skills. By providing mothers with much-needed encouragement and practical strategies to help their daughters grow into emotionally healthy and capable adults, "I'm Not Mad, I Just Hate You!" can transform the tempestuous teenage years into years of positive, enriching growth.
  

What people are saying - Write a review

Review: I'm Not Mad, I Just Hate You!: A New Understanding of Mother-Daughter Conflict

User Review  - Rachel - Goodreads

No, my mother and I have no problems. Why do you ask? Read full review

Review: I'm Not Mad, I Just Hate You!: A New Understanding of Mother-Daughter Conflict

User Review  - Goodreads

No, my mother and I have no problems. Why do you ask? Read full review

Contents

WHY IT FEELS DIFFERENT NOW
THE EMOTIONAL FALLOUT OF CONFLICT
LEARNING FROM YOUR OWN MOTHER
TAKING STOCK OF YOUR ASSETS
A WHOLE NEW WORLD
UNIVERSAL THEMES
TEENS DEVELOPMENTAL TASKS
THE SOCIETY GIRLS LIVE IN
She Insults You and Then Accuses You of Overreacting
WHEN IT IS SOMETHING YOU DID
THE GRAY AREA
HOW MOTHERS ARE MANIPULATED
GIVE YOUR DAUGHTER TIME
BEWARE OF SIDETRACKING ATTEMPTS
STAND YOUR GROUND
HOW TO STAY ON TRACK

SOCIETYS MESSAGES TO GIRLS
WHAT IS YOUR FAMILY LIKE?
FAMILIES MESSAGES ABOUT CONFLICT
EXAMINING THE CULTURE
LOOKING FOR ROLE MODELS
BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR DAUGHTER
YOUR PRESENT RELATIONSHIP
MOTHERS MOS
YOUR DAUGHTERS CONTRIBUTIONS
BLUEPRINT FOR A STRONG FOUNDATION
LASHING OUT OR EXPLODING
INDIRECT EXPRESSIONS
MISPLACED EMOTIONS
SUPPRESSED EMOTIONS
LETTING THINGS SLIDE
WHEN IT FEELS OVERWHELMING
WRONG REASONS TO CONFRONT
THE CLASSIC BATTLE STARTERS
TEACHING YOUR DAUGHTER TO CHOOSE BATTLES
SETTING GUIDELINES
NEVER TOO LATE
REWARDING HER EFFORTS
RESPONSIBLE COMMUNICATION
HOW TO RESPOND
WHEN HER ANGER HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU
She Wont Even Admit Shes in a Bad Mood
SHED UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS
THE MAJOR ISSUES FOR GIRLS
HOW GIRLS REACT
A MOTHERS STRATEGIES
TAKING A FEW STEPS BACK
THE ART OF FORGIVENESS
EMPATHY AS A FIRST STEP
HOW TO FORGIVE
FORGIVING DOESNT MEAN FORGETTING
LEARNING TO TRUST HER AGAIN
WHEN YOU ARE THE ONE ASKING FOR FORGIVENESS
WHAT YOU KNOW ABOUT HER SOCIAL LIFE
THE INVITATION THAT NEVER COMES
USE YOUR SKILLS
WHEN FRIENDS ARE MAD AT HER
PLAYING OUT A SCENARIO
RESPECT YOUR ELDERS
FEAR OF BEING PUNISHED
ESTABLISHING THE MINDSET
PRACTICE THE PROCESS WITH HER
ASSESSING THE CONFRONTATION TOGETHER
ACTING OUT HER DISTRESS
KEEPING IT ALL INSIDE
RESPONDING TO HER SELFBLAME
HELPING HER DEAL WITH MISTAKES
Copyright

Common terms and phrases

About the author (2000)

Roni Cohen-Sandler, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist specializing in the issues of women and adolescent girls. Her work has appeared in many national publications, and her television and radio appearances include "Oprah," "Today," "Good Morning America," "CBS News," and "NPR," She is a frequent lecturer to lay and professional audiences.

Silver is the senior editor of Girls' Life magazine and winner of a recent Parents Choice Award.

Bibliographic information