28 Humorous Stories: Old and NewErnest Rhys, Catharine Amy Dawson Scott |
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ain't Archibald Archie asked Barden Baronet Billson Blanecapple bosom friend bottles Bouncer breakfast Bunyard Captain Bilge Captain Swinby carter chair clothes Cressage cried dear door drunk Earl eyes face feel fell fellow Five Towns gentleman girl goin hand head heard hour Jehoshaphat Kilbagie knew Knight of Kerry Korner laddie Lady Dain Lady Grantham laugh looked Lord Mansion House married mate matter Maudie McCabe mean Mickleham minutes Miss Greene morning Muldevon Naseby never night o'clock P. G. WODEHOUSE Peter Grant Polyphemus poor portrait Previn Pucker Ravenscourt Park replied round seemed Sir Jee sitting skipper smile soldier sorry sort stood suddenly sure talk tell there's thing thought thrush Tobermory told Tommy took turned twas Ukridge voice W. W. Jacobs walked What's William Smith
Popular passages
Page 237 - So she went into the garden to cut a cabbage-leaf, to make an apple-pie; and at the same time a great she-bear, coming up the street, pops its head into the shop. 'What! no soap?
Page 58 - ... consumed the valuable time of Sellers and Harry for many weeks, and served to keep them both in the highest spirits. In the eyes of Washington Hawkins, Harry was a superior being, a man who was able to bring things to pass in a way that excited his enthusiasm. He never tired of listening to his stories of what he had done and of what he was going to do. As for Washington, Harry thought he was a man of ability and comprehension, but "too visionary,
Page 249 - expostulated Mr. Appin ; " after all my years of research and experiment " " You can go and experiment on the shorthorns at the farm, who are under proper control," said Mrs. Cornett," or the elephants at the Zoological Gardens. They're said to be highly intelligent, and they have this recommendation, that they don't come creeping about our bedrooms and under chairs, and so forth.
Page 107 - ... old floating motion. We were still some way from the ground, and took what seemed like a long time in reaching it. I looked round somewhat hurriedly, the tail was still there, and I could see nothing wrong. As we got close to the ground the machine was doing long swings from side to side, and I made up my mind that the only thing to do was to try and jump clear of the wreckage before the crash.
Page 248 - My husband and I are very fond of Tobermory — at least, we were before this horrible accomplishment was infused into him; but now, of course, the only thing is to have him destroyed as soon as possible." "We can put some strychnine in the scraps he always gets at dinner-time," said Sir Wilfrid, "and I will go and drown the stable cat myself.
Page 244 - I do," was the response, couched in a tone of even indifference. A shiver of suppressed excitement went through the listeners, and Lady Blemley might be excused for pouring out the saucerful of milk rather unsteadily. "I'm afraid I've spilt a good deal of it,
Page 245 - Tobermory's rejoinder. Another silence fell on the group, and then Miss Resker, in her best district-visitor manner, asked if the human language had been difficult to learn. Tobermory looked squarely at her for a moment and then fixed his gaze serenely on the middle distance. It was obvious that boring questions lay outside his scheme of life. "What do you think of human intelligence?" asked Mavis Pellington lamely. "Of whose intelligence in particular?" asked Tobermory coldly. "Oh, well, mine for...
Page 105 - Well, I haven't any sympathy for you. It serves you right for the way you've gone on all these years." I thought he -was asleep again, but at last his drowsy accents proclaimed : ' ' What a perfect fool you are ! You always follow the line of least resistance." I laughed outright at that, and exclaimed : " Well, if ever there was a case of the pot calling the kettle black!
Page 198 - At this time, an elderly Fly said it was the hour for the Eveningsong to be sung; and on a signal being given all the Blue-Bottle-Flies began to buzz at once in a sumptuous and sonorous manner, the melodious and mucilaginous sounds echoing all over the waters, and resounding across the tumultuous tops of the transitory Titmice upon the intervening and verdant mountains, with a serene and sickly suavity only known to the truly virtuous. The Moon was shining slobaciously from the star-bespringled sky,...
Page 243 - My dear Miss Resker," said the wonder-worker patiently, "one teaches little children and savages and backward adults in that piecemeal fashion; when one has once solved the problem of making a beginning with an animal of highly developed intelligence one has no need for those halting methods. Tobermory can speak our language with perfect correctness." This time Clovis very distinctly said, "Beyond-rats!" Sir Wilfrid was more polite, but equally sceptical. "Hadn't we better have the cat in and judge...