A Relationship Is a Living Thing: It Must Be Nurtured to Stay Alive and GrowMany marital relationships that dissolve could survive, and even thrive, if the couple realized that there is an art and science to love and intimacy, and were willing to learn and practice it. This involves learning how to experience the difference between our ego and our Self. Quieting the mind through meditation, using methods both traditional and "home made," is the key to this experience. It is the felt sense of the deep Self within that moves us to choose to be kind or considerate when our egos would have us behave otherwise. When we extend ourselves in friendship, a genuine fondness for one another begins to grow which then nurtures the soul of our relationship. Cultivating these qualities promotes deep, spiritual partnership and long term intimacy. This book offers both principles and practices for those who feel they may be ready to engage this kind of soul-centered learning. Russell Crescimanno, Ph.D., is Professor Emeritus at Piedmont Virginia Community College. He has been teaching courses in sociology for forty years. One in particular, called Marriage and Family Relations, became his passion as both his personal life and the climate of the culture regarding marriage and divorce changed over time. He has also been a student and practitioner of the science of meditation and Self realization for twenty years. This work has complemented his specialization in the sociology of knowledge and his desire to understand how society shapes human consciousness, and therefore our relationships. Motivated by the growing divorce rate in the country, the painful stories of so many students who come from "broken" homes, and the dissolution of his first two marriages he has been increasingly invested in learning what it takes to keep love alive - and what we now know is sure to deaden it. |
Contents
| 7 | |
| 21 | |
THE IMPORTANCE OF QUIETING | 39 |
TOOLS FOR GROWING STRONG ROOTS | 53 |
THE SELF AS SOUL AND SPIRIT | 77 |
FROM FIGHTING TO CONSTRUCTIVE | 96 |
RUMINATION AND NEGOTIATION | 115 |
FROM CONFLICT AND CRISIS | 135 |
FRIENDSHIP FORGIVENESS | 153 |
Common terms and phrases
allow anger apology Art of Loving attention aware become begin behavior Bo Lozoff called challenge chapter choose comes compassion conflict connected conscious commitment couples create cultivate Dalai Lama deep deeper defensive divorce effort emotional energy especially essence essential eventually everyday experience faith feel fighting forgiveness friendship going grow happens heal heart Human Kindness Foundation hurt ignorance images important inner inside intimacy intimate relationships involved issue James Hillman keep kind lectio divina listen lives mantra phrase Marianne Williamson meaning meditation mind nature negotiation ness nurture Once one's ourselves pain Paramahansa Yogananda partner partnership person problems realize rela remember remind rience romantic love rumination seed sense share simply soul spirit stay step story struggle talk things thoughts tionship truly truth turn typically understanding Viktor Frankl words wounds York