Being Single in a Couples' World: How to be Happily Single While Looking for Love

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Free Press, 1998 - Family & Relationships - 224 pages
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How many times have you said to yourself, "This is the last wedding I go to alone"? Are you at a loss for answers when your friends and family suggest that "your problem is you're too picky" or "you're not trying hard enough"? Does it seem like all the good ones are taken? Whether you are actively looking for a mate or have decided that marriage isn't what you want right now, psychotherapists Xavier Amador and Judith Kiersky can help you deal with the problems that come from being single in a couples' world.

Drawing on years of clinical experience and research with both single and married clients, Amador and Kiersky have identified the five common stumbling blocks that can get in the way of enjoying singlehood. Taking a careful look at the obstacles that cause single people the most pain, the authors have developed a four-step plan to help you achieve balance and happiness whether or not you stay single. And the first and most challenging step is to stop buying into old-fashioned ideas about singlehood and marriage.

What's making you unhappy isn't being single but the false assumptions that we all hold about marriage-- what the authors call cultural and personal "marriage scripts". Cultural scripts equate matrimony with maturity, morality, and success and serve to make single people feel like second-class citizens. Personal marriage scripts, the subconscious expectations each of us has about marriage, get in the way of forming healthy, satisfying, and lasting relationships.

Combining clear advice and vivid case examples, "Being Single in a Couples' World" gives all of us the tools we need to find our way to a healthier self and more meaningful relationships.

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Contents

Its a Couples World
3
Being Single Today
12
Where Do You Fit In?
26
Copyright

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About the author (1998)

Kiersky is an Adjunct Professor at New York University.

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