Boundaries with Teens: When to Say Yes, how to Say No

Front Cover
Zondervan, 2006 - Family & Relationships - 284 pages
Helping Your Teen Be Responsible and Responsive The teen years can be challenging and even scary for parents and those involved with youth. Attitudes and behaviors of the adolescent can be unhealthy for him and for the family. However, good boundaries are the bedrock of not only better relationships, but also maturity, safety, and growth---especially for teens and their parents. In order to help teenagers grow into healthy adults, parents and youth workers need to help them experience how to take responsibility for their behavior, their values, and their lives. Dr. John Townsend, coauthor of the Gold Medallion Award-winning book Boundaries, is a parent of two teenagers himself. With wisdom and empathy, he applies his biblically based principles to bear on the challenging task of the teen years, showing parents: * How to deal with disrespectful attitudes and irresponsible behaviors in your teen * How to set healthy limits and realistic consequences * How to be loving and caring while establishing rules * How to determine specific strategies to deal with problems both big and small The book begins by giving parents a way to look at adolescence itself, so they can better understand how a teen thinks, feels, and relates to others. Then it provides the nuts and bolts of what boundaries are all about and how to apply them. There are many topically based chapters devoted to specific problems, from moodiness to school problems to aggression. Finally, Townsend addresses the attitudes, conflicts, and difficulties of parents themselves, helping them resolve their own personal obstacles to being an effective maturing force for the teen. Also available on unabridged audio CD, read by the author.
 

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User Review  - mama - Christianbook.com

I am really enjoying this book and alot of it has applied to my family situation. (not the heavy stuff like cutting etc... that is a very small part of the book) Just things like me backing off and ... Read full review

User Review  - shawn - Christianbook.com

This is such a great book. It gives very practical and effective parenting guidelines. It is giving my husband and I the tools needed to raise 3 boys. I cannot say enough good things about it. We are so blessed to have such good, bible based instruction at our figertips. Thank you Dr. Townsend. Read full review

Contents

Acknowledgments
7
Who Threw the Switch?
9
Part One Be a Parent with Boundaries
19
Revisit Your Own Adolescence
21
Be a Boundary
29
Get Connected
33
Face Your Guilt and Fear
39
Be United in Your Parenting
45
Breaking Agreements
167
Chores
171
Clothing
175
Curfew Violations
179
Cutting and SelfMutilation
183
Deception and Lying
187
Defiance
191
Detaching from the Family in Unhealthy Ways
195

Be an Integrated Parent
49
For Single Parents
55
For Stepparents
61
Part twO Understand the Teenage World
67
The Last Step before Adulthood
69
A Period of Tremendous Change
75
Teens Think Differently
79
Separating from Parents
83
From Earthly to Eternal Parent
91
Understanding the Differences between Boys and Girls
95
The Influence of Culture
99
Part three Set Boundaries with Your Teen
105
Dig beneath Your Teens Problem
107
Use the Four Anchors of Boundary Setting
113
Dont Get Derailed
121
Consequences 101
131
Part FOur Address Common Problems
141
Academic Problems
143
Aggressive Behavior
149
Alcohol Drugs and Dependencies
155
Argumentativeness
161
Disrespect
199
Driving and Cars
205
God and Spirituality
209
Ignoring Parents
213
Impulsive Behaviors
217
Internet
223
Money
227
Moodiness
231
Parties
237
Peers
243
Phone
249
Runaways
253
Sexual Involvement
259
Silence
265
Epilogue
269
Seeking the Help of a Professional
273
Tips for When You Dont Know What to Do
275
Notes
277
About the Author
280
About the Publisher
281
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