Breaking Through Betrayal: And Recovering the Peace Within

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Loving Healing Press, 2009 - Psychology - 170 pages
2 Reviews
Are you ready to finally recover your peace of mind?
We are living in a time where betrayal abounds. Tragically, most of know or know of someone who has been scarred by the betrayal bandit. In whatever form it takes (financial, political, personal, social, legal, environmental, cultural, etc.), no one is immune from the infectious waves of betrayal moving through our society. "Breaking Through Betrayal: And Recovering the Peace Within" is for any individual who has experienced or is experiencing betrayal, who carries the wounds or scars of betrayal injury, and who is struggling to break through its bonds. Betrayal has known us far longer than we have known it; it is time to change that. Readers of this book will be challenged to:
Explore the different kinds of betrayal while connecting with the experiences of others. Unravel the emotions and behaviors that accompany betrayal injury and explore the factors which contribute to the intensity and duration of symptoms. Empower yourself by embracing an interactive healing process tailored specifically for recovery from betrayal injury.Revive and restore your mind, body, and spirit through a series of activities, exercises, and self-assessments which provide tools for renewal, as well as working through relapse or re-injury.Reclaim your rightful sense of self.
Therapists Praise "Breaking Through Betrayal"
"Useful for anyone caught in self-blame, shame or repeated victimization. Though almost the antithesis of my inner-transformation approach, this empowering 'in-control' approach can help readers take charge, assess injury, gauge healing and find excellent strategies to protect themselves from future trauma when relating to one's betrayer."
--Beth Hedva, Ph.D. author of award-winning "Betrayal, Trust and Forgiveness"
"This volume deals with the subject of betrayal, and is appropriate as a self-help aid for clients. It also contains useful suggestions for therapists dealing with those who have experienced betrayal of trust of several kinds: interpersonal, familial, sexual, and financial. The steps in the healing process are well outlined and make clear that relapse is to be expected. Overlap with loss and the grief process is also well discussed."
--Lucy R. Ferguson, Ph.D., Member, AFTNC
Faculty Member and Dean Emerita, CSPP, Alliant University
About the Author
Holli Kenley is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in the state ofCalifornia. She holds a Masters Degree in Psychology with an emphasis onMarriage, Family, and Child Counseling. For over a decade (both as an intern and a licensed clinician), Holli has worked in a variety of settings: a women's shelter and transitional housing, a counseling center, and in private practice.
Learn more at
From the New Horizons in Therapy Series at Loving Healing Press
Self-Help: Abuse - Psychological
Family & Relationships: Dysfunctional Families
Psychology: Cognitive Therapy

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Breaking Through Betrayal: and Recovering the Peace Within Author: Holli Kenley Publisher: Loving Healing Press ISBN: 978-1615990092 Betrayal. Just about everyone has felt let down by someone they ... Read full review

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Breaking Through Betrayal: and
Recovering the Peace Within
Author: Holli Kenley
Publisher: Loving Healing Press
ISBN: 978-1615990092
Betrayal. Just about everyone has felt let down by someone they care about. It's tough to deal with, and even tougher to move past it and put it behind you. Once someone lets you down, it's difficult to be sure they won't do it again. You probably find it hard to count on them for awhile. Now imagine someone you love does more than let you down or disappoint you.
The case that immediately comes to mind is that of Tiger Woods and his wife, Elin. Fortunately, most of us will never have to undergo so public a betrayal, so well known and discussed. Betrayal happening to anyone, regardless of their public stature, is extremely painful. Being out of the public limelight doesn't lessen the pain and disbelief that will follow. Betrayal doesn't just happen in romantic relationships. Humans can feel betrayed by friends, politicians, public figures, just about anyone. During the current rough economic times, you may feel betrayal at the loss of a job, foreclosure, or any number of other situations. Friends betray us, leaving us discouraged and distrustful. Betrayal leads to feelings of worthlessness, depression, anxiety and anger. You may be grieving over the betrayal, or feel obsessed by the thought of what happened, or cling more tightly to those around you that haven't betrayed you.
Holli Kenley has written a book that goes in depth to explain the how and why behind the feelings we have following a betrayal. By understanding more about why those feelings occur, one is able to validate them, understand the need for the feelings and offer encouragement and empowerment to move beyond betrayal and into a healthier, more peaceful mindset. Then recovery can truly take place.
Section I of this book covers the knowledge and awareness of exactly what betrayal is, why we suffer negative emotions because of it. She'll clarify the different forms and levels of trust we invest into various relationships, allowing the reader to fully discover their feelings about the individual betrayal and learn to recognize the true depth and degree of the emotions you feel and what you have experienced. You begin to understand the only way to be healthy and whole emotionally is to acknowledge the painful emotions and work through them.
In Section II, the discussion centers on other recovery considerations that may require attention. For example, codependency, which is basically overinvestment of personal resources into someone/something without an adequate return or replenishment. A level of codependency can complicate the journey to recovery. Grief is another recovery consideration. Grief is a natural outgrowth of betrayal, and to successfully recover from betrayal one must understand the degree of their grief and how to work to alleviate it.
Section III is where we move beyond the "prep" work into the actual recovery process. Kenley breaks the process down into five distinct parts, followed by extensive information and techniques for successfully moving through each of the five parts. She includes very specific exercises and instructions for completing each level of the process. Additional resources that offer support are listed.
Overall, this work will be extremely useful to anyone going through a betrayal personally, or trying to help a friend or loved one navigate their way through. Written in a style easy to understand and relate to, it offers help to anyone at any step of the recovery process.
Because the book is well written and detailed, those in a helping profession can utilize these steps and activities with clients of any age who may be experiencing betrayal in any of its many forms. A valuable handbook to maintain in any permanent reference library, this reviewer highly endorses this fine work.

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