Everyday Dad

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Lasaria Creative Publishing, 2008 - Humor - 136 pages
Take a wild ride through fatherhood with Dale Alderman and his two young sons, Chase and Logan. You'll laugh out loud as this goofball dad and his kinetic kids turn normal daily activities into hilarious escapades. Based on actual events that occurred over his first twelve years as a father, Dale presents a collection of funny stories including: Breast Pads and Nipple Cream, Honey, I Shrunk My Underpants, Don't Hit Your Brother With a Stick, Prime Rib With a Side Order of Valium, The Hooter Fairy, and The Farmer Cuts the Cheese. Before he became a father, no one told Dale the stuff he really needed to know, like how to deal with a rampaging three-year-old at the circus, or how to corral two boys before they demolish a restaurant. From a Little League baseball game to a grade school field trip, he finds a wealth of humor in his real-world experiences. Come on along and let Dale show you how much he loves being an Everyday Dad.
 

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Contents

Breast Pads and Nipple Cream
3
The Hooter Fairy
7
Ill Be Gone for Only a Few Minutes
10
I Should Wear a Cup
13
Look Out Hes Gonna Blow
15
Whats in a Name
18
Ya Better Get This Potty Started
22
Stop It Quit It Stop It Quit It
25
Boys and Girls Are DifferentDuh
66
Just a Little Pressure
70
Take My Advice Please
74
TelevisionIs Nothing Sacred?
77
My Wife Is Cool Toy Challenged
80
No Place Like Home for the Holidays
84
HuhWhat?
88
Honey I Shrunk My Underpants
91

Where Does the Money Go?
29
Daddy Are You Awake?
33
Vacations Will Never Be the Same
36
SuperChildren of the Corn
39
The Farmer Cuts the Cheese
42
Happy Fathers Day
44
Dont Hit Your Brother With a Stick
48
Strike Four Strike Five
51
Mine is Bigger than Yours
54
Business Travel Sucks
57
Maybe I Should Check One More Time
60
The Rabid Fundraisers
63
Stinkerhead
94
The School Field Trip
97
Im a Fashion Disaster
100
Prime Rib With a Side Order of Valium
103
Dad Can I Ask You a Question?
106
Im Bored
110
The Birds and the Bees
113
Happy Birthday to Me
116
Myths Old Wives Tales and the Truth
119
A Letter to My Sons
123
About the Author
125
Copyright

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About the author (2008)

Dale Alderman lives in Northern Virginia with his wife, Starla, and two sons, Chase and Logan. He graduated with a Bachelor’s Degree in Marketing from Virginia Tech in 1984 and received a Master’s Degree in Information Management from Marymount University in 1995. For 19 years, he worked for large global corporations, and then he decided to get a real life and spend time with his family. An award-winning author, Dale has appeared on FOX & Friends on the FOX News Channel and has appeared on many nationally syndicated radio shows. He is the author of Everyday Dad, a hilarious book about fatherhood, Big White Panties, a riotous book about relationships, and The MegaDog Tales, a middle grade adventure series about a cocker spaniel that becomes a superhero. In his spare time, Dale avoids going to the gym, feeds his addiction to chocolate, watches movies with his kids, coaches youth sports, and spoils his golden retriever, Gracie. You can send an email to him at dalealderman@lasariacreative.com. For more information, please go to www.lasariacreative.com.

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