Figuring it Out Fast: The Family's Best Approaches to Nursing Homes
This guidebook tries to inform readers of the best approaches in dealing with nursing homes and nursing home circumstances. The primary perspectives are those of family members. There are five primary chapters which trace through this heart wrenching experience: the very idea of it; the necessity; shopping for the best and how to negotiate; and adjusting and problems.
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LISTING OF STATE LONGTERM CARE OMBUDSMEN ACROSS THE UNITED STATES
LISTING OT STATE AGENCIES ON LICENSING AND CERTIFICATION ACROSS THE UNITED STATES
LISTING OF ADDITIONAL INFORMATION RESOURCES
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Page 3 - I hear a lot of words that end in "y." Is this how my kids felt? My hearing aid works fine. There is little need for anyone to position their face directly in front of mine and raise their voice with those "y" words. Sometimes it takes longer for a meaning to sink in; sometimes my mind wanders when I am bored. But there's no need to shout. I tried once or twice to make my feelings known. I even shouted once. That gained me a reputation of being "crotchety." Imagine me, crotchety. My children never...
Page 3 - I've had 3 children and I know it isn't pleasant to clean another's diaper. My husband used to wear a gas mask when he changed the kids. I wish I had one now. Why do you think the staff insists on talking baby talk when speaking to me? I understand English. I have a degree in music and am a certified teacher. Now I hear a lot of words that end in "y.
Page 4 - ... But I would like to see them more. One of them is here in town. He visits as much as he can. Something else I've learned to accept is loss of privacy. Quite often I'll close my door when my roommate — imagine having a roommate at my age — is in the TV room. I do appreciate some time to myself and believe that I have earned at least that courtesy. As I sit thinking or writing, one of the aides invariably opens the door unannounced and walks in as if I'm not there. Sometimes she even opens...
Page 5 - I'm losing weight. Back to my semiprivate room for a little semiprivacy or a nap. I do need my beauty rest, company may come today. What is today, again? The afternoon drags into early evening. This used to be my favorite time of the day. Things would wind down. I would kick off my shoes. Put my feet up on the coffee table. Pop open a bottle of Chablis and enjoy the fruits of my day's labor with my husband. He's gone. So is my health. This is my world.
Page 3 - ... We meet them anew daily, hourly or more often. We smile and nod gracefully each time we hear a retelling. They seldom listen to my stories, so I've stopped trying. The help here is basically pretty good, although there's a large turnover. Just when I get comfortable with someone he or she moves on to another job. I understand that. This is not the best job to have. I don't much like some of the physical things that happen to us. I don't care much for a diaper. I seem to have lost the control...
Page 4 - It's not comfortable. The seat squeezes you into the middle and applies constant pressure on your hips. The armrests are too narrow and my arms slip off. I am luckier than some. Others are strapped into their chairs and abandoned in front of the TV. Captive prisoners of daytime television; soap operas, talk shows and commercials. One of the residents died today. He was a loner who, at one time, started a business and developed a multimillion-dollar company. His children moved him here when he could...
Page 5 - I'll sit around and wait for it. What is today? One day blends into the next until day and date mean nothing. Let's watch a little TV. Oprah and Phil and Geraldo and who cares if some transvestite is having trouble picking a colorcoordinated wardrobe from his husband's girlfriend's mother's collection. Lunch. Can't wait. Dried something with pureed peas and coconut pudding. No wonder I'm losing weight. Back to my semiprivate room for a little semiprivacy or a nap. I do need my beauty rest, company...