I Laid an Egg on Aunt Ruth's Head: Conquering English and Its Ruthless Ways

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AuthorHouse, Sep 1, 2009 - Humor - 296 pages
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Whether she is flying a fighter jet, outwitting a dangerous bank robber, walking a tightrope with her pet elephant Binky, or traveling to sixteenth century Italy in a time machine, Aunt Ruth takes the reader on one adventure after another. During the course of her adventures, Aunt Ruth encounters and struggles with myriad grammatical and usage difficulties with the English language. In a clean, humorous, and family friendly style, Joel Schnoor's stories will leave you rolling on the floor and will answer those nauseating English questions at the same time.
 

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Contents

Laid an Egg on Aunt Ruths Head
1
Aunt Ruth is Hopefully Hopeless
4
With a Small Luck
6
Aunt Ruth Is She for Whom the Bell Tolls
10
Aunt Ruth is a Babe is She Not?
16
Aunt Ruth Comprises Surprises
21
Aunt Ruth Can CanCan
25
Should Have Thrown Aunt Ruth Further
29
Aunt Ruth and the Time Machine
99
Aunt Ruth Knows How to Get to Carnegie Hall
108
Yours Truly
113
A Myriad of Complimentary Stationery
119
Irregardless Aunt Ruths Show Goes On
125
Aunt Ruth and Capital Punishment
131
Aunt Ruth Splits an Infinitive
137
Aunt Ruth Kung Fu Master
142

As Aunt Ruth Likes It
35
The Tuba That Aunt Ruth Plays
39
If I Were King I Would Be Aunt Ruthless
44
AuntRuthing
54
Everyone Says Aunt Ruth is Al Capones Sister
58
Will Shall and Salsa with Aunt Ruth
64
Its Aerobics Class at its Finest
70
Aunt Ruth is Parenthetically Speaking
75
Aunt Ruth and Binky Have Nothing to Lose
81
Aunt Ruth and the Crown Prince of Wells
86
Aunt Ruth and the Apostrophe
92
Aunt Ruth Goes over the Edge
159
Aunt Ruth Has No Principals
175
Aunt Ruth and the Sahara Dessert
188
The Mystery of the Incomplete Address
202
Look Whos Nauseous Now
219
Common Rough Spots in English
237
Complimentary and Complementary
244
Lighted and Lit
258
Myriad
259
Relevant Grammar Points in Each Story
273
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