Ignorance is Blitz: Mangled Moments of History From Actual College Students

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Workman Publishing, May 1, 2015 - Humor - 155 pages
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Now in chunky format, the funniest book ever written about the history of Western Civilization. Originally published under the title Non Campus Mentis, this book made four national bestseller lists—The New York Times, USA Today, The Washington Post, and BookSense; has 200,000 copies in print; and garnered praise from across the country: "Glorious . . . equal-opportunity idiocy for every era."—Philadelphia Enquirer. "A horrifically hilarious compendium . . . knitting together errors, assumptions, and creative fact-making that are shocking and hysterical."—Associated Press. "You'll laugh until you cry, shedding tears for the state of American education."—Baltimore Sun.

Compiled by Professor Anders Henriksson from the term papers and blue book exams of students who clearly made it to college before the advent of "No Child Left Behind,"Ignorance Is Blitz is unput-downable. You won't believe what you just read, and won't want to wait to see what's coming next, from the Virgin Mary's Immaculate Contraption to Pericles' greatest erection, the Parthenonon to Custard's Last Stand to Hitler shooting himself in the Bonker and Martin Luther King's ground-breaking speech, "If I Had a Hammer." And who knew: Caesar was assassinated on the Yikes of March, when he is reported to have said, "Me too, Brutus." Rasputin was a pheasant by birth. Victims of the black plague grew boobs on their neck. Judyism had one big God named Yahoo. Marie Curie won the Nobel Prize for inventing the radiator. And "During the Dark Ages, it was mostly dark."
 

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User Review  - freecyclor - LibraryThing

I've wasted my life - shoulda been a history teacher. This little collection of quotes from student blue book essays may be the best bathroom reader ever! Until yesterday I had been unaware that the ... Read full review

Contents

Hindsight into the Future
1
The Stoned Age
3
The Joy of Flooding
5
Thucydides Meets the Mouse of History
11
Me Too Brutus
17
The Immaculate Contraption
23
The Rise of the Manurial System
27
Vacant Bishop Bricks
31
Custards Last Stand
87
Splatterism and the TwelveMoan Scale
91
From the Missionary Position to Sweet Relief
95
An Unthinkable War Becomes Thinkable
103
Rasputin Meets the Zeitgeist
107
Just Give Peas a Chance
111
Hitler Becomes Depressed
119
The Morels of the Story
125

A Plague of Boobs
39
The Grits of Change
45
The Perils of Pope Clementine
51
Musketeers and Round Ones
57
The Invention of the Newton
63
The French Demand Fraternities
67
The Fast Paste of Change
73
Anarchs and the Power Serge
81
Tea with Dim El Sum
133
The Age of Now
137
The Meaning of All This
139
So You Think Youre So Smart
143
Maps
146
Epilogue
151
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About the author (2015)

Anders Henriksson is a professor of history at Shepherd College in West Virginia. Author of Ignorance Is Blitz, he has been featured on The Today Show, CBS Sunday Morning, and National Public Radio. He and his wife live in Harpers Ferry, West Virginia.

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