In the Event of My Untimely Demise: Twenty Things My Son Needs to Know

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Harper Collins, Apr 29, 2008 - Family & Relationships - 224 pages
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When Brian Sack's mother passed away, he was left with a letter and a pink cardigan. The cardigan was promptly placed in a drawer, but the letter was pure gold. In just a few pages of fancy cursive, her posthumous dispatch offered the kind of guidance you would expect from a mother to her young son. And while he didn't necessarily follow all the advice, he never forgot how very important those words—and that letter—were to him. Decades later, on the verge of parenthood himself, Brian decided to write something for his own child, wanting a legacy, and not just a pink cardigan, to leave to his son. But far from the usual collection of advice, Brian has written a sharp, sage, warts-and-all survival guide to life.

With quick wit and self-deprecating honesty, Sack draws from his experiences, tapping them for the humor within. Holding nothing back, he:

  • Gives the skinny on relationships—don't let the woman you love wander alone in France
  • Commiserates about the death of the meritocracy—wanting to sing doesn't mean you can
  • Recounts his awkward entry into fatherhood—you'll overcome your aversion to poo
  • Offers firsthand advice—avoid any bipolar lady with a drug-sniffing wonder-cat
  • And argues that the Empire State Building is not a phallic symbol—no matter what the professor said

Every chapter takes on subjects ranging from the universal and mundane to the life changing and inevitable. With its funny and heartfelt musings from a father to a son, In the Event of My Untimely Demise is a delightful life primer for all of us.

 

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Contents

Introduction
1
Dear Son
5
Change Starts at Conception
9
High Reasonable Hopes
19
Trust Your Gut
27
Fight Cub
37
Well Need to Talk
51
There Is a Light at the End ofthe Tunnel
59
Gray Is Good
95
Deferred Pay
105
On Knots
117
Meet the Parents
127
Respect Your Elders Wisely
139
Friends Indeed
149
How I Am Different
161
Mortalitys in the House
171

Your Career
69
You Cant Take It with You
77
Get Up Get Out and Go Where the Toilets Are Different
87
What Old People Can Offer Us
179
Live to Be Missed
199
Copyright

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About the author (2008)

Brian Sack offers humorous commentary on the Glenn Beck Show and Not Just Another Cable News Show, as well as on his award-winning blog, banterist.com, and in publications such as McSweeney's, The Independent, and Glamour.

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