In the Name of Love: Romantic Ideology and Its Victims

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Oxford University Press, 2008 - Psychology - 278 pages
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Because of love I killed her... if I didn't love her, I don't think I would feel so much pain... It's like she took an arrow and stabbed me in the heart. "I knew that it was going to happen. I told her there would be a disaster... that I would take out myself or I'd take her out. Leave me alone. Go away. Leave me alone. Go away." We yearn to experience the idealized love depicted in so many novels, movies, poems and popular songs. Ironically, it is the idealization of love thatarms it with its destructive power. Popular media consistently remind us that love is all we need, but statistics concerning the rate of depression and suicides after divorce or romantic break up remind us what might happen if "all we need" is taken away. This book is about our ideals of love, our experiences of love the actual disparity between the two and how we cope with this disparity. A major case study featured in the book concerns men who have murdered their wives or partners allegedly 'out of love'. It is estimated that over 30% of all female murder victims in the United States die at the hands of a former or present spouse or boyfriend. How can murdering a loved one be associated with the supposedly moral and altruistic emotion of love? Not only is love intrinsically ambivalent, but it can also give rise to dangerous consequences. Some of the worst evils have been committed in the name of love. A unique collaboration between a leading philosopher in the field of emotions and a social scientist, In The Name of Love presents fascinating insights into romantic love and its future in modern society.

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Contents

Romantic Ideology If you love someone
1
Love at breaking point What have I got to do
39
The ambivalent nature of romantic love What is this thing
61
Copyright

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About the author (2008)


Professor Aaron Ben-Ze'ev, the President of the University of Haifa, is Professor of Philosophy. He earned his doctorate at the University of Chicago (1981). He has served as Rector, Dean of Research, Chairperson of the Department of Philosophy, Head of the Haifa University Press, and Head of the Academic Channel. His research focuses upon the philosophy of psychology and especially the study of emotions. He is considered one of the world's leading experts in the study of emotions. He has written many books and articles on these topics including: The Perceptual System (Peter Lang, 1993).The Subtlety of Emotions (MIT Press, 2000), and Love Online: Emotions on the Internet (Cambridge University Press, 2003). Ruhama Goussinsky, Ph.D, is a lecturer in the Human Service Department in Emek Ysreel College and Haifa University in Israel. She wrote her doctorate on men who murdered their female partners and has participated in the National Survey on Violence Against Women in Israel.

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