Paris of Troy: NA
Being the judge of a beauty contest between three goddesses isn't all it's cracked up to be. Yes, the goddesses are breathtakingly beautiful, and they each offer something of great value as a bribe to make the judge name her as the most beautiful, but they are awfully sore losers - and that can be downright hazardous to any mortal foolish enough to judge them. Meet Paris of Troy. A young man with abandonment issues, desperately trying to deal with the pressures of marriage and fatherhood, until a trio of goddesses teach him what it really means to lose his mind. This wildly funny novel finally brings the Homeric legends into the realm of humorous fiction.
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Achilles Aeneas Aesacus Agamemnon Agelaus ain’t Ajax Amazons answered Antheus Antimachus Anyway Aphrodite arms army arrow asked baby bastard beautiful believe brother Cadmus can’t city’s couldn’t course crazy Cronus crowd cubits damned Deidameia Deiphobus didn’t Ethiopians eyes face father felt figure finally folks fucking goddamned gonna Greeks guess hand head heard Hector Helen I’ve immediately kill King knew laughed let me tell looked Memnon Menelaus Mount Ida never night nodded Odysseus Oenone Okay Pandarus Paris Patroclus Penthesileia Phereclus Philoctetes pissed Polyxena pretty Priam Prince Pytho quickly referee screamed seemed Sergeant ship shit shouted sister smiled soldiers sorry Sparta spear standing stared started stood stop stupid suddenly sure swear sword talking temple there’s thing Thonis thought told took Trojan Troy Troy’s turned waaahhhhhhh walked wasn’t watched what’s women wonder Yeah yelled Zeus