Rather Than Work
Most people could think of a thousand things they would rather be doing than being at work, or going to work the next day. The authors have put together a group of seventy-five examples of extreme, somewhat offensive, politically incorrect, and yet accurate things that one can do rather than go to their place of employment. Here is but a sample of those work-alternative suggestions:
* I would rather guess the first show's weights of The Biggest Loser contestants by having them stand barefoot on my face than go to work tomorrow. * I would rather be strung up like a piņata and smashed with baseball bats by angry children than go to work tomorrow. * I would rather pick up dog feces with my teeth than go to work tomorrow. * I would rather steal Marty McFly's DeLorean, go back to 1985, and get repeatedly punched in the face by a 19 year old, brass knuckled Mike Tyson than go to work tomorrow. * I would rather travel to Maine, jump on a fishing boat, and receive a circumcision by a 13 lb lobster than go to work tomorrow.