Refined Behavior: A Manual for Barbarians
The world suffers from an insidious malaise of ill-advised, uncouth behavior. In the name of liberty, the rules of decorum and courtesy have been cast aside like yesterday's coffee grounds...or empty mayonnaise jars...or maybe washed-up ballplayers. In their ensuing ignorance, the masses are desperate to learn of things civil and considerate. Accordingly, what the world needs now is a set of quick-start instructions on refined behavior. We need an etiquette reboot--and a magnanimous leader.
Auspiciously, Mizencole Nut has come to our aid. And he is the man for the task. Cultivated comportment comes naturally to him. It is in his blood. He can tie a Windsor knot in the dark with one hand strapped to a bedpost. He never buttons the wrong holes in his shirts, and he never--ever--puts his shoes on the wrong feet. You can trust Mizencole Nut. He delivers the answers you need to leave barbarism behind. Read him in confidence and rest assured that, although "Refined Behavior" may not make you a culture expert overnight, delusional lunacy is all but guaranteed in one reading...two at most.