Relational Masks: Removing the Barriers That Keep Us Apart

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InterVarsity Press, Sep 20, 2009 - Religion
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The Avoider. The Deflector. The Self-Blamer. The Aggressor. Recognize someone you know? Or yourself? We all know people who seem to get stuck in unhealthy patterns of relating to others. Sometimes we're puzzled by a loved one's evasiveness or surprised by a friend's defensive aggression. Occasionally we look in the mirror and see such troubling behaviors in ourselves. All of these are masks that we hide behind, and they prevent us from having authentic relationships with others. Counselor Russell Willingham identifies the relational masks that obstruct us from relating freely to other people and to God. Drawing on a wealth of practical experience and biblical insight, he diagnoses the destructive ways that we respond to others and shows how underlying false beliefs govern our thinking and actions. He also shows how each mask can be subverted from within and turned inside out to help us move toward healthy relationships. Each chapter includes tools and questions for discussion and application. Discover how to relate to others with the honesty and authenticity God intended--and find the relational freedom and satisfaction you ve been yearning for.
 

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Contents

THE STRONGHOLD OF RELATIONAL MASKS
16
THE FOUNDATION OF RELATIONAL MASKS Core Beliefs
23
THE AVOIDER Smoldering Rebel
44
THE DEFLECTOR Cardiophobic
57
THE SELFBLAMER Worshiper of the Darkness
68
THE SAVIOR Idolatry of Serving
83
THE AGGRESSOR Hostility as a Shield
99
THE SPIRITUALIZER God as a Mask
116
THE SECRET TO LIFE WITH GOD
134
THE SECRET TO LIFE WITH OTHERS
159
This I Know
173
The Seven Core Beliefs at a Glance
176
The Six Relational Masks at a Glance
180
Discussion Questions
185
Notes
192
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About the author (2009)

Russell Willingham is executive director of New Creation Ministries, based in Fresno, California. He counsels, leads groups and speaks nationwide on issues related to sexual addiction. He has presented workshops at several annual conferences of Exodus International, at the American Association of Christian Counselors World Conference (2001) and at the AACC Superconference on Sexuality (2002). He is also a participant in AACC's video curriculum on healthy sexuality. He is an ordained minister with the Assemblies of God International Fellowship and works under the supervision of Dr. Jonathan Olford, Ph.D. of the Link Care Counseling Center in Fresno, California.

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