So Now You're a Zombie: A Handbook for the Newly Undead

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Chicago Review Press, Oct 1, 2010 - Humor - 224 pages
All aspects of the zombie lifestyle are surveyed in this satirical take on an orientation manual for the newly undead. From how one became a zombie in the first place and the stages of zombification to survival mechanisms, this handbook offers specific advice on everything a fresh zombie needs to know about "life" expectancy, hunting techniques, hitching a ride, hand-to-mouth combat, and feeding etiquette. Instructions for extracting the living from boarded up farmhouses and broken down vehicles are included along with dozens of helpful diagrams outlining attack strategies such as the Ghoul Reach, the Flanking Zak, the Bite Hold, and the Aerial Fall for securing human prey and their all-important flesh and brains.
 

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LibraryThing Review

User Review  - ThothJ - LibraryThing

This was a really funny book. It is about time that someone wrote a handbook to help the newly "Zombified" out there. There are plenty of non-fiction books written to help "breathers" deal with the ... Read full review

LibraryThing Review

User Review  - ThothJ - LibraryThing

This was a really funny book. It is about time that someone wrote a handbook to help the newly "Zombified" out there. There are plenty of non-fiction books written to help "breathers" deal with the ... Read full review

Contents

1 What the Hell Am I?
1
2 Your Zombie Body
15
3 Know Your Enemy
31
4 Hunting for Brains
41
5 Transportation
65
6 Attacking
79
7 Human Buffet
105
8 Infecting
117
9 In the End
135
The Zombie Code
143
A Message for the Living
145
Copyright

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About the author (2010)

John Austin is the author of Mini Weapons of Mass Destruction, and Prank University. He lives in Cincinnati, Ohio.

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