Teenagers Learn What They Live: Parenting to Inspire Integrity & Independence

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Workman Publishing, Oct 14, 2002 - Family & Relationships - 240 pages
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Parenting by example. Using the simple, powerful message that turned Children Learn What They Live into an international bestseller with over 1.5 million copies in print, Drs. Dorothy Law Nolte and Rachel Harris bring their unique perspective to families with adolescents.

Structured, like the first book, around an inspirational poem, Teenagers Learn What They Live addresses the turbulent teenage years, when a stew of hormones, pressures, and temptations makes for such extreme challenges for parents and children. Teenagers addresses popularity and peer pressure ("If teenagers live with rejection, they learn to feel lost"); the responsibilities of maturity ("If teenagers live with too many rules, they learn how to get around them./ If teenagers live with too few rules, they learn to ignore the needs of others"); body image and the allure of cigarettes, drugs, and alcohol ("If teenagers live with healthy habits, they learn to be kind to their bodies"). Central to the book are ways for parents to communicate with their teenage children-including how to deal with being "tuned out" and when to start the conversation again-and how to strike the right balance between holding on and accepting a teen's growing independence. Hundreds of examples of parent-child interactions cover everything from the all-night graduation party to problems of sexual identity, providing great guidance as well as effective conversation starters.


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If teenagers live with pressure they learn to be stressed
If teenagers live with failure they learn to give up
If teenagers live with rejection they learn to feel lost
If teenagers live with too many rules they learn to get around them
If teenagers live with too few rules they learn to ignore the needs of others
If teenagers live with broken promises they learn to be disappointed
If teenagers live with respect they learn to honor others
If teenagers live with trust they learn to tell the truth
If teenagers live with natural consequences they learn to be accountable
If teenagers live with responsibility they learn to be selfreliant
If teenagers live with healthy habits they learn to be kind to their bodies
If teenagers live with support they learn to feel good about themselves
If teenagers live with creativity they learn to share who they are
If teenagers live with caring attention they learn how to love
If teenagers live with positive expectations they learn to help build a better world

If teenagers live with openness they learn to discover themselves

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About the author (2002)

Rachel Harris, L.C.S.W., Ph.D., is a psychotherapist who completed postgraduate training in family therapy and parenting education. She lives with her teenage daughter in Princeton, New Jersey. Rachel has know Dorothy Law Nolte for almost 30 years as teaching associates and co-workers.

Dorothy Law Nolte, Ph.D. is a lifelong teacher and lecturer on family life education, and is the author of the poem "Children Learn What They Live," which has been translated into 20 languages and is used the world over by parents and educators. The mother of three, grandmother of three, and great grandmother of five, she lives and works in southern California.

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