Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes: A No-Bullshit Guide to World Mythology
Cronus liked to eat babies.
Narcissus probably should have just learned to masturbate.
Odin got construction discounts with bestiality.
Isis had bad taste in jewelry.
Ganesh was the very definition of an unplanned pregnancy.
And Abraham was totally cool about stabbing his kid in the face.
All our lives, we’ve been fed watered-down, PC versions of the classic myths. In reality, mythology is more screwed up than a schizophrenic shaman doing hits of unidentified…wait, it all makes sense now. In Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes, Cory O’Brien, creator of Myths RETOLD!, sets the stories straight. These are rude, crude, totally sacred texts told the way they were meant to be told: loudly, and with lots of four-letter words.
Skeptical? Here are a few more gems to consider:
• Zeus once stuffed an unborn fetus inside his thigh to save its life after he exploded its mother by being too good in bed.
• The entire Egyptian universe was saved because Sekhmet just got too hammered to keep murdering everyone.
• The Hindu universe is run by a married couple who only stop murdering in order to throw sweet dance parties…on the corpses of their enemies.
• The Norse goddess Freyja once consented to a four-dwarf gangbang in exchange for one shiny necklace.
And there’s more dysfunctional goodness where that came from.
What people are saying - Write a review
LibraryThing ReviewUser Review - regularguy5mb - www.librarything.com
This is very much the "drunk guy in a bar won't stop talking about stuff from his major" version of world mythology. O'Brien uses modern, and often quite colorful, language to explain in the most ... Read full review
LibraryThing ReviewUser Review - hadden - LibraryThing
Interesting re-telling of myths to show the gods in a poor light. Greek, Norse, Egyptian, Mayan, Judeo-Christian, Hindu, Japanese, African, Sumerian, Native American and even American myths are re ... Read full review