Survivor: A Novel
Tender Branson -- last surviving member of the so-called "Creedish Death Cult" -- is dictating his incredible life story into the flight recorder of Flight 2039, cruising on autopilot at 39,000 feet somewhere over the Pacific Ocean. He is all alone in the plane, which will shortly reach terminal velocity and crash into the vast Australian outback. Before it does, he will unfold the tale of his journey from an obedient Creedish child and humble domestic servant to an ultra-buffed, steroid- and collagen-packed media messiah, author of a best-selling autobiography, Saved from Salvation, and the even better selling Book of Very Common Prayer (The Prayer to Delay Orgasm, The Prayer to Prevent Hair Loss, The Prayer to Silence Car Alarms). He'll even share his insight that "the only difference between suicide and martyrdom is press coverage," and deny responsibility for the Tender Branson Sensitive Materials Landfill -- a 20,000-acre repository for the nation's outdated pornography. Among other matters both bizarre and trenchant.Not since Kurt Vonnegut's Mother Night and Jerzy Kosinski's Being There has there been as black and telling a satire on the wages of fame and the bedrock lunacy of the modern world. Survivor is Chuck Palahniuk at his deadpan peak, and it marks him as a blazing talent for the new millennium.
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Adam Branson Adam says agent is saying agent says ammonia bathroom Biddy bottle brother burning caseworker Cha-Cha CHUCK PALAHNIUK church district colony church elders clean Creedish church district crypt daily planner daiquiris dance dark dead door dream everything eyes fake feel Fertility Hollis Fertility says Fertility's finger floor flowers front gin and tonic girl going Grand Island gun says hair hand happened head inside Interstate 80 keep killed kitchen listening live lobster look meat loaf minute miracle mouth says murder never night plane police Port Vila Prayer remember Ronald McDonald House scrubbing sign goes sitting smoke someone speakerphone rings stadium suicide Super Bowl talk TelePrompTer television Tender Branson There's thing told Trevor truck turn walk watch week what's whisper window yelling