. . . being a book about Alvin, Frannie, Dolby, Brian, Belinda (doing eighty), Tyra the Beautiful, Stephen King, Pink Floyd, peach schnapps (and lemonade), hope, dreams, Scotland, death-defying driving, tenpin bowling, love and money, The Lord of the Rings, U2, infinity, Brian's nipples, noddies, text-messages, barmaids, virginity, Radiohead, The X-Men, exams, Frannie's patter, the death of punk . . . Clive Barker, the emptiness at the heart of it all, weapons, Spider-Man, Han Solo . . . and everything under the sun is in tune, as the sun is eclipsed by the moon . . .
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aboot Ah dinnae Ah'll Ah'm Ah've album Ally McCoist Alvin Awright Bacardi Breezers Belinda boyracers boys Brian and Frannie Brian Mann cannae car-park Clive Barker Connor Livingstone d'ye Dad's Denis Lill didnae Dolby Dolby's doon door Elvis Costello eyes face Falkirk feel film fingers Fools and Horses Fran Frannie Frannie's fuck fuckin Gibson girls glance gonnae grin hair Hallglen hand head Heddy-haw Ibrox Irn-Bru Kottsy Lads laugh listening look mate mobile mobile-phone mouth movie mutters night nods Pink Floyd play Radiohead Rangers realise round Runt says Scotland screaming shag shake Shiney shite shouts shrugs smiles someone sound Spider-Man Spider-Man movie staring Stephen King stovies talk tell Tesco There's thing trying turns Tyra Tyra's Uriel want tae watch Wendy Whit Whit's window ye've yese