I Can't Believe I Just Did that: How (seemingly) Small Embarrassments Can Wreak Havoc in Your Life-- and what You Can Do to Put a Stop to Them

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Jeremy P. Tarcher/Penguin, 2004 - Self-Help - 256 pages
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Social scientist David Allyn examines the subtly damaging effects of shame and embarrassment on our everyday lives-and offers powerful advice for identifying and managing them.

For many of us, when it comes to asking for a raise, asking someone to dinner, or just saying what we think in a difficult situation, a quietly lurking fear of embarrassment undermines our ability to effectively get the job done. Yet often-times, we are so accustomed to these feelings-or so eager to forget them once they have disappeared-that we fail to notice how dramatically they are shaping our actions.

In I Can't Believe I Just Did That, David Allyn draws upon extensive research in psychology and the social sciences, as well as the real-life experiences of the numerous subjects who participated in a study conducted for this book, to illustrate the impact embarrassment has on our day-to-day encounters. He shows readers how, if left unchecked, even the briefest incidents of embarrassment-in the checkout line at the supermarket or with a family member or coworker-can have negative repercussions on the important relationships in our lives. Through exercises designed to identify and ultimately dissolve these feelings of self-doubt and confusion, Allyn presents readers with a powerful program for transforming our spirals of shame into spirals of achievement.

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User Review  - carterchristian1 - LibraryThing

There are a lot of books out there about how to feel better, work better, just be better, but this one is a really practical one that I am actually going to try to follow though with. While the text ... Read full review

I Can't Believe I Just Did That: How (Seemingly) Small Moments of Shame and Embarrassment Can Wreak Havoc in Your Life-And What You Can Do to Put a Stop to Them

User Review  - Not Available - Book Verdict

This perceptive self-helper puts its finger on the sense of shame that is such a prominent feature of social psychology. Social scientist Allyn (Make Love, Not War) notes the ways in which pervasive ... Read full review


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The Perils of Pulling In
The Trouble with Trumping Up the Truth

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About the author (2004)

David Allyn, Ph.D., is a Harvard-trained social scientist. A Visiting Scholar at the Institute for Social and Economic Research and Policy at Columbia University, Allyn's essays have appeared in such publications as The Journal of American Studies, The New York Times Magazine, and The Washington Post.

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