Sh*t My Dad Says

Front Cover
HarperCollins, May 4, 2010 - Humor - 176 pages
1696 Reviews

After being dumped by his longtime girlfriend, twenty-eight-year-old Justin Halpern found himself living at home with his seventy-three-year-old dad. Sam Halpern, who is "like Socrates, but angrier, and with worse hair," has never minced words, and when Justin moved back home, he began to record all the ridiculous things his dad said to him:

"That woman was sexy. . . . Out of your league? Son, let women figure out why they won't screw you. Don't do it for them."

"Do people your age know how to comb their hair? It looks like two squirrels crawled on their heads and started fucking."

"The worst thing you can be is a liar. . . . Okay, fine, yes, the worst thing you can be is a Nazi, but then number two is liar. Nazi one, liar two."

More than a million people now follow Mr. Halpern's philosophical musings on Twitter, and in this book, his son weaves a brilliantly funny, touching coming-of-age memoir around the best of his quotes. An all-American story that unfolds on the Little League field, in Denny's, during excruciating family road trips, and, most frequently, in the Halperns' kitchen over bowls of Grape-Nuts, Sh*t My Dad Says is a chaotic, hilarious, true portrait of a father-son relationship from a major new comic voice.

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Exceptionally easy to read. - Goodreads
Funny and vulgar quips, weak in plot however. - Goodreads
Great read and a beautiful love story. - Goodreads
It had a really sappy ending, but it was hilarious. - Goodreads
Some, great sage advice throughout! - Goodreads
Very funny, easy to read, a bit poignant in the end. - Goodreads

Review: Sh*t My Dad Says

User Review  - David O'neal - Goodreads

I needed a quick easy humorous read. Wasn't as funny as Id hoped but enjoyable nonetheless. Probably more so because I have been in both roles: father and son. Read full review

Review: Sh*t My Dad Says

User Review  - Hailey Montemorano - Goodreads

Funny. Read full review

All 76 reviews »

About the author (2010)

Justin Halpern is the author of the #1 New York Times bestseller Sh*t My Dad Says, inspired by his massively popular Twitter feed. SPOILER ALERT: He lives with his wife in Los Angeles.

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