Yes Means Yes: Visions of Female Sexual Power and A World Without Rape

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Seal Press, Dec 2, 2008 - Health & Fitness - 256 pages
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In this groundbreaking new look at rape edited by writer and activist Jaclyn Freidman and "Full Frontal Feminism" and "HeOCOs A Stud, SheOCOs A Slut" author Jessica Valenti, the way we view rape in our culture is finally dismantled and replaced with a genuine understanding and respect for female sexual pleasure. Feminist, political, and activist writers alike will present their ideas for a paradigm shift from the ?No Means NoOCO model?an approach that while necessary for where we were in 1974, needs an overhaul today.
"Yes Means Yes" will bring to the table a dazzling variety of perspectives and experiences focused on the theory that educating all people to value female sexuality and pleasure leads to viewing women differently, and ending rape. "Yes Means Yes" aims to have radical and far-reaching effects: from teaching men to treat women as collaborators and not conquests, encouraging men and women that women can enjoy sex instead of being shamed for it, and ultimately, that our children can inherit a world where rape is rare and swiftly punished. With commentary on public sex education, pornography, mass media, "Yes Means Yes" is a powerful and revolutionary anthology."

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LibraryThing Review

User Review  - amongstories - LibraryThing

It’s not an easy thing to fit my thoughts and reactions to Yes Means Yes into a review. This is an incredibly provoking collection of essays that takes an honest look at views of sexuality in America ... Read full review

LibraryThing Review

User Review  - ryvre - LibraryThing

I'm not normally a fan of Jessica Valenti, but I liked the premise of this book enough that I decided to give it a try, and I'm glad I did. Like any anthology, it had it's high points and low point ... Read full review


Foreword 1
Introduction 5
The Conservative Gender Norms That Perpetuate Rape Culture and How Feminists Can Fight Back 13
2 Toward a Performance Model of Sex 29
Consent as Sexual Process 43
4 A Womans Worth 53
5 How Do You Fuck a Fat Woman? 67
6 Queering Black Female Heterosexuality 77
The Lessons Boys Learn and Dont Learn About Sexuality and Why a SexPositive Rape Prevention Paradigm Can Benefit Everyone Involved 193
17 The NotRape Epidemic 209
18 Shame Is the First Betrayer 221
19 Why Nice Guys Finish Last 227
20 Sex Worth Fighting For 241
A Personal Story of Love Violence and Strategies for Survival 251
22 When Pregnancy Is Outlawed Only Outlaws WillBe Pregnant 265
A Conversation with Three Sex Workers on Sexuality Empowerment and the Industry 273

Surviving Incestin Real Life 93
8 A Love Letter from an AntiRape Activist to Her Feminist SexToy Store 107
Why the Female Sexual Submissive Scares Us and Why She Shouldnt 117
10 Invasion of Space by a Female 127
Sexual Violence Against Immigrant Women in the United States 141
Black Female Lasciviousness and the Question of Consent 151
How Date Rape Became Gray Rape and Why It Matters 163
Rape Culture Explicit Verbal Consent and Body Sovereignty 171
15 An Immodest Proposal 179
24 The ProcessOriented Virgin 287
The Myth of Sexual Purity and How It Reinforces Rape Culture 299
26 Real Sex Education 305
How I Stopped Worrying and Learned to Love Pleasure and How You Can Too 313
notes 321
contents by theme 333
about the contributors 341

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About the author (2008)

Jessica Valenti is the author of three previous books, including The Purity Myth: How America s Obsession with Virginity is Hurting Young Women. She is also the founder of, which the Columbia Journalism Review called head and shoulders above almost any writing on women s issues in mainstream media. Jessica called one of the top 100 inspiring women in the world by the Guardian speaks at universities and organizations in the U.S. and abroad about feminism, activism, and media. She lives with her family in Boston, but remains a New Yorker at heart.

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