Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves: Transforming Parent-Child Relationships from Reaction and Struggle to Freedom, Power and joy
Every parent would happily give up ever scolding, punishing or threatening if she only knew how to ensure that her toddler/child/teen would thrive and act responsibly without such painful measures. Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves is the answer to this universal wish. It is not about gentle ways to control a child, but about a way of being and of understanding a child so she/he can be the best of herself, not because she fears you or seeks your approval but because she wants to, of her own free will. Aldort's guidance takes the struggle out of parenting. The book is full of real life stories, often leaving the reader moved to tears or laughter and relieved to discover that there is a kinder way. The SALVE communication formula has been praised for providing a hybrid of The Work of Byron Katie and Nonviolent Communication. It gives parents the tools to move beyond their initial unproductive reaction, to a response that is connecting and empowering to the child and to themselves.
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This mistakenly says that Naomi Aldort has a Phd, which she admitted years ago was from an unaccredited online university. She no longer sells counselling sessions as she is not registered to do so. Be aware. Thought-provoking book, but marred by her misrepresentations of her education and qualifications.
I did telephone counselling with Naomi a few years back but am now glad that I followed my own heart and didn't give in to every whim of my children. I have met children raised like this (not on their own island in isolation as Naomi's were) and the sense of entitlement is staggering. Also children who stay up as late as they wish, sleep in, and can do as they wish, aren't very pleasant to be around. I don't feel that children raised very permissively fit into society as well as those who are taught to see the needs of others, not just their own.